okierivermama (okierivermama) wrote,

Bone Headed Husbands

  Every husband has the ability to be boneheaded now and then, and some days I feel like I could teach a class on them.  Most of my friends husbands have their moments, even my dad who can be awesome dad, has the ability of being a boneheaded husband now and again.  This past week has proven this point to me a dozen times over.  I love Chris with all my heart, but  can I just say that boys/mens thinking just bewilders me. 

We had a conversation at dinner Wednesday about how windy it was and that this would not be a good time for a fire.  That he needed to wait till one of these days when it was calmer to run a burn pile and a controlled burn on part of our back yard.  We have 6 acres in the country....most of it tree covered and therefore leaf covered.  I came in here to bathe Sawyer.  Next thing I know, I walk back out into the living room, and see fire glowing in the back.  This is not a good thing when all parties are prepared.  It is less of a good thing when NOONE is prepared.  I walked on the porch to ask whats going on and Keifer yells back at me from the fort...."Daddy set the woods on fire and we are all going to burn to death." 
Tanner is jumping up and down begging me to get down his fireman suit so he can go fight the fire with daddy.  I hurry up and get the baby in jammies and put him down with a bottle grab shoes and run out the back, hollering for the boys to get inside and watch a movie.  Somewhere in here Keifer reminds me that daddy grounded him from tv for the rest of the week.  I don't care right now what daddy said...watch a movie and come get me if the baby is crying too badly. 
Flames are licking the BRAND NEW SHED....you know the one we just made the first freaking payment on and FILLED with everything from the storage site in town....oh and the fact that it has 2 five gallon gas cans FULL sitting inside it escaped Chris' notice.  And they are licking at the boat(which also has a full 5 gallon gas can in it because he's been working on the motor) and the orig bed off the Chevy. 

Can you guess I was not a very happy camper.  He was running across toward the shop(where there was no sign of fire) and I grabbed every hose I could find and sstarted hooking them together.  He came around with the lawnmower and just got the boat out of the way.  I began spraying everything I could reach.  We worked on it for a good while and then I had to call a neighbor to ask for more hose,  He came over and other neighbors stopped by.  We had to call the Forrestry Division in to come in.  All in all about 10 acres burnt. 
Oh and to clarify how far in the country we are.....when we called 911, the girl said they were busy to call back in a few minutes.

In asking Chris what the hell he was thinking starting a fire in this wind(listed as one of the windiest days of the year)  he said well I was cutting that tree and I heard the leafs move and I couldn't see anything so I thought it was a snake.  I didn';t have the pistol with me just the leaf burner(basically a torch attached to a 20 lb propane tank)  so I shot with that....
(OMG and I leave my children alone with you????)

Thursday morning, my mom called and was already in a state....I assumed that someone else had told her we had a fire(my uncle is a vol fireman in the next county and usually calls us to check on all fires reported in our area).  So in trying to calm her down I told her not to worry it was only about 10 acres and only about 3 of it is ours.  She had no clue what I was talking about.  She was calling to fuss about my dad.  Apparently he was trying to hook his truck up to his boat trailer, and managed to ram the boat trailer into the house. 
She isn;t sure (and to be honest, he isn;'t either) whether he just missed the brake, or hit the gas.  See Boneheaded, and it runs from engineers to wanna be rednecks......

I have decided though, that those things aren't always the important ones, its how we deal with them that makes the difference. 
One thing is for sure, I cannot say my marriage or life in general since Chris came into it has ever been boring or dull.  Not that I would mind those things once in a while, but I have a feeling that considering the apples around here certainly didnt fall far from the tree....I have years of  crazy ahead of me. 

Bless his heart I love that man even when he is a bonehead. 


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